I actually sucumbed this time and visited the doctor, with the intention of asking for a prescription for stronger drugs as none of the over the counter headache meds seemed to do anything to shift it. I couldn't get into my regular doctor so I saw a new doctor in the practice, and did the whole extended interview session as she got to know me. For the first time ever, I had someone diagnose the type of headache I get and explain why they also affect my neck and upper back so much. Among other things, she explained I need to find ways to relieve my stress and why I didn't need stronger drugs.
And then when I went home to spend the rest of the day resting, it hit me that there are times - often - that my crafting is stressful.
When I think about why I started quilting and scrapbooking, it's pretty safe to say that adding stress to my already busy life wasn't on the agenda.
I worry about getting the latest batch of photos uploaded and printed, then getting my Project Life pages up to date. Then I worry about finishing the 27 (yep, I said it out loud, for real) quilting WIPs finished. Then I worry about whether I'll ever get to start a new quilt without guilt about the WIPs. I worry about helping my daughter get a quilt finished. I worry about whether there are enough low volumes in the world for my EPP diamonds. I worry about whether ladder stitch will be okay for EPP. I worry about the state of the mending basket. I worry about what I'll blog about next, and replying to blog comments. I worry about not having a goal for the month for ALYOF.
And that was just last week.
To reiterate, I'm not a professional blogger, quilter or sewist. This habit doesn't make me money. I have a full time job, and three children and a husband.
I am busy enough that I don't need my hobby to add extra pressure to my life.
I'm not linking up any works in progress or finishes this week. I'm not putting anything on top priority for a finish for ALYOF this month.
Whatever I want. When I want to.
I'll play with one project till it gets boring, then move to something else. I'll stop saying can't, have to, wait... I'll stop as soon as my body tells me we've had enough time behind the machine.
I'll stop comparing myself to others.
I'll play with design and colour and whatever else takes my fancy on any given day. I still want to grow as a quilter, but part of that comes with just doing.
Do you ever feel like this? Do you ever wonder when what you did for fun started to feel like work, even when it's not? Do you even think it's possible to quilt with no guilt?
If you've stuck with me this far, I appreciate it. And apologies for putting that Frozen song into your head, but it's rather appropriate, don't you think?
Hang in there and I hope you feel better soon. I have had chronic headache issues for years and I do think it will help if you can let it go. Sometimes I just craft aimlessly- like just open a charm pack and start sewing stuff together with no real plan or maybe even play with a craft I have not done much, like making paper flowers from old books or just doodling with sharpies. Then the expectations are not there and I don't stress about if something is good enough, because hey if I hate the results I can cut up what I pieced and make it into something else, or the paper flowers can just go into the trash.
ReplyDeleteEverything you've written rings true to my ears. I work full time and craft whenever I want but I place unrealistic and stressful 'deadlines' on myself but I want to be a part of every QAL, swap and 'finish-it-up-along going on etc so that I loose my focus on sewing for me, for friends and family. I thought I was moving back to Canada from the UK a few years back so I made 60 scrapbooks with the photos I had printed and I never finished getting all my pictures into albums = stress!! And guess what - I didn't move and haven't worked on a scrapbook since (burnt out I guess!). You keep smiling and do the heck you want WHEN you want. I will too!!!
ReplyDeleteGood for you!!! Hobbies should be done for fun..not to stress over! I'm also a scrapbooker, as well as a knitter/crocheter.. so I hear ya on trying to keep up with everything. It makes it difficult sometimes. Relax, and "Let It Go.." :-)
ReplyDelete~ Jess ~
Everything Is Coming Up Rosie
I would like to say that I have learnt not to stress over my quilty/crafty habits, but when I think about it - I'm pretty sure there are times when I do! BUT, I have learnt that there are not enough hours in the day, days in the week, weeks in a month and months in a year to do absolutely everything I would love to do! And I don't even work full time! I take my hat off to you to be able to achieve what you do in the time you have. You should be very happy and proud with that. I also found that when I was switching from just making children's clothes with my business to cushions and quilts and bags, I was stressing majorly about whether it would work. And then I just thought "this is what I WANT to do", not about what others want me to do. Once I realised that, my customers didn't disappear and I gained a whole new batch of customers! You gotta just go with the flow..... xxx
ReplyDeleteA very true, and inspiring, post. Thank you Jane! I'm slowly learning to let go of the things that don't matter so I can focus on those that do. And that it IS ok to have quilt tops lying around!
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing this! I stopped over from Alyce's blog today and feel like I already know you! :) I guess that's because I can relate so much to what you are writing about. I took a long self-imposed break from social media and production-style crafting last year, and I have to say that it really helped me to refocus and find the joy again in making things. I think you'll get a lot of good things out of taking some time for yourself. Best of luck!
ReplyDeleteI love this post and I've had all the same feelings. I hope you can find a balance between fun and feel like you must sew.
ReplyDeleteI totally understand what you're saying. I don't know how people who blog every day still get enjoyment from it. I think it would feel like a chore if it was something I had to do each day. I think we should just sew what we like, when we like, and feel free to share it if we want to. We do tend to place unrealistic pressures on ourselves, even regarding our hobbies and spare time. Perhaps we all just need to ease up a bit and not feel guilty about doing absolutely nothing sometimes.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds like you've already done some re-prioritizing, so I hope a break helps you to get rid of the headaches. All the best. Wendy
I'm new to blogging (only 6 months) and also new to quilting. I got to the stage where I was worrying because I didn't have anything to blog about as I wasn't churning out quilts every week. I was worried I would lose the few followers I had. Then I caught myself on. I was blogging mainly for my own benefit, to document my quilting progress, not as a career. If people wanted to come along on my journey then well and good. If they got bored with waiting for me to post again I was not going to stress.
ReplyDeletePour yourself a drink, walk around your garden or local park, listen to some music, whatever…. relax!
So so true :-) I also suffer from terrible migraines and tension headaches. And at the moment my 'hobby' is certainly adding to my stress. My plan is to reduce the number of blogs I am following, and seriously question whether it is wise to link up to finish-a-longs, etc. I love the Slow Blogger Linky at knottedcotton.com because it acknowledges that we do like to blog to show the things we have made, but we don't have time to blog regularly! I also plan to take the whole of June and most of July off social media - it makes me tired! Hope you start to feel better soon, and find ways to relax :-)
ReplyDeleteYou are so right to step back and try to enjoy the journey! Living in Australia I often feel quite remote from what happens in both the US and UK- the 'design new fabric', 'write a quilt book', 'go to market', and 'buy more fabric' treadmill many seem to be on! My motto for this year was "Savour Every Stitch" and that has helped me enormously! Remember- it's not a competition!
ReplyDeleteAwesome blog post, thanks for sharing your thoughts + experience. I have a chronically bad back, and continue to see my physio every six weeks to keep things going ok. All the hunching-over cutting and sewing definitely contribute to lower + upper back and neck stress - even if the whole sewing/crafting/scrapbooking process was totally stress-free. I've got a Bambach saddle seat as my sewing-machine chair - it cost a lot but has been an absolute life-saver, as it's enabled me to continue sewing - it was either that or sew standing up (or stop sewing!).
ReplyDeleteI'm taking a big step back from swaps this year, and never even attempt to join in with linky blog posts - I just can't keep up! Until I've actually finished a quilt each for my girls, I just can't commit to anything else - that's what I'm finding really stressful.
I love sewing, blogs, instagram - the whole bit - but there are definitely times when it's best to step back with a cup of tea (or glass of wine) and totally disengage for a little while. Good luck with your path from here. Cat
It's the quilting/blogging curse ... trying to keep up with commitments and expectations that we put on ourselves because we want to join in on all the fun. I like your philosophy of "letting it go"
ReplyDeleteWell said and when it comes down to it - it supposed to be fun isn't it.
ReplyDeleteGreat post Jane! I'll join you in being guilt free and letting go when I catch up on bee blocks, quilt two customer quilts and do some paper work... Gah!!! Enjoy xxx
ReplyDeleteI relate to letting stuff go......like the 300 emails in my inbox because I wasn't feeling like turning on my computer for 2 or 3 days. It's why I only answer my cell phone when I want to (unless it's from one of my kids or the husband) I have the phone for my convenience. I don't even need the song to Let it go!!!! It's your life so live it the way you need to to be a happy healthy person.
ReplyDeleteThanks for sharing great post Jane! Hobbies are supposed to be fun and a way to relax but I know exactly what you are saying! Good luck with stepping by :)
ReplyDeleteAmen, SISTA!!!
ReplyDeleteYou are so right. There comes a point where you have to step back and say, "Why am I doing this?" If it isn't fun anymore, then there's no point in doing it. I hope you find your balance and your joy again.
ReplyDeleteQuilt with NO Guilt! That is a blogger button right there! But -no pressure to make one. I just loved that line.
ReplyDeleteI've been where you are. I have a full time job and two kiddos and truly had to put my quilting on hold when I first started the job. It was a total mindset adjustment. I didn't blog for months, wasn't on IG, didn't do swaps. Now, I'm slowly dipping back into things as I feel like i can handle them and they don't stress me out. When I think about quilting, it so I have something fun to think about rather than the stress of my day, or the stress of my unemployeed husband, or the latest kid sickness. You know what I"m talking about!
Good luck with the shift, you can do it and you will be happy you did. Maybe take a break from reading other blogs for a while. It's hard when you see people who get to devote their lives to quilting and you can't.
Good girl! This is meant to be fun! Enjoyable! A stress reliever! I realised many years ago that I will always have UFO's - and so what? As you said, just make what you want, in your time and enjoy the process - it's why I do a lot of hand work. May not get many finished, but I have fun along the way! Take care of yourself. And if it helps, here's a hug!
ReplyDeleteSo well put Jane!! I hav been going through the same thing and constantly have to remind myself of what my priorities and goals are. It can be hard to not compare myself and my achievements to others but I have found that using myself as my own measuring stick is what works best for me! I wish I could write like you ;)
ReplyDeleteYes yes yes!
ReplyDeleteDo what makes you smile, and share that smile when and if you feel the need....it's that simple......thankyou for speaking the story that many of us share just with slightly different themes x
ReplyDeleteIt is important to stop and hear what your body is telling you. I forgot that lesson and ended up in Physio for a shoulder that just plain didn't like what I was doing to it. It is much better now and I am more aware of what I was doing. Excellent post. Joanne
ReplyDeleteI do a weekly pilates class with a certified physio on a Monday evening and she can tell when I've spent the whole weekend at the machine! There's always the pressure from the expectations we have of ourselves, the designs we want to explore and things we want to make and the WIP and to do list gets longer! I too work a full time job so your post strikes a chord with me too. Today I'm going to take the afternoon off guilt free and take the dogs for a good long walk!
ReplyDeleteOh my - I see a physical therapist twice a week as I'm constantly in pain from sitting at the machine, hand sewing and standing in the quilt shop where I work. I've reduced my working days at the store to two per week to put less physical stress on my body and to have more time to be creative without having to work at quite such a fast pace. I don't blog about my pain and I wonder how many others are the same? Thank you for your post, it strikes a chord with me and probably many more quilters/crafters too :D
ReplyDeleteHope you don't mind, I've featured your post here on my facebook page :D
DeleteBy all the comments, I think you have hit a nerve!
ReplyDeleteI totally understand. I don't get pain or headaches, but I find myself putting myself under pressure to finish things. I have to remind myself that this is FUN, and that I am allowed to take as long as I like. The problem is that, like you, I have more ideas in my head than I will ever have time in my life to sew, even if all I ever did was sew.
I never count my WIPs. I am in denial.
Love it. Quilting is for the pleasure of making, as much as the outcome x
ReplyDelete